tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post3691637095088587004..comments2023-11-03T11:55:43.684-04:00Comments on My Thoughtful Spot…: "D" is for Dad~Tracyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12795817810030681267noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-87321673889534201962011-04-07T10:25:59.149-04:002011-04-07T10:25:59.149-04:00I'm so sorry that you had this horrible void i...I'm so sorry that you had this horrible void in your life. My dad was a remarkable man and of all that I knew -- I always no that no child was loved greater than I.KathyAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12723937251892708482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-75694093393697631922011-04-06T09:47:39.857-04:002011-04-06T09:47:39.857-04:00We all seem to have different memories fo our dad....We all seem to have different memories fo our dad. I come from a very different generation when fathers never talked very much, so I often wonder about that now that I see my sons playing with their chidren.<br />RitaRitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03791201457372887378noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-56069170862467307352011-04-06T00:48:04.151-04:002011-04-06T00:48:04.151-04:00Tracy. I wish I had words of wisdom for you. Howe...Tracy. I wish I had words of wisdom for you. However, we all have someone in our lives who have hurt us tremendously. If we can not find a way to forgive them we are only hurting ourselves. <br /><br />No one starts life saying I want to be a terrible dad, or mother, or sister etc. Something happens along the way that turns some of us into just that. Maybe they were abused or whatever...you get my drift. My husband was a terrible father and I left him. He was a terrible father because his even more terrible father drummed this kind of behavior into him. He had no more ability to change after years of brainwashing then a leopard can change his spots. ktAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01967340091034274347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-10047583619014734282011-04-06T00:00:57.258-04:002011-04-06T00:00:57.258-04:00Hi Tracy, I was a Daddy's Girl ---and was the...Hi Tracy, I was a Daddy's Girl ---and was the Apple of his EYES.... Being the only girl (I had 2 brothers), I just had Daddy wrapped around my finger... He was so special. Unfortunately, he died in 1969 ---so I didn't have him nearly long enough.<br />Hugs,<br />BetsyBetsy Banks Adamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16223591156634767330noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-19161555532020777482011-04-05T23:11:38.746-04:002011-04-05T23:11:38.746-04:00Tracy, I would imagine this was a difficult post f...Tracy, I would imagine this was a difficult post for you to write. I'm sorry your relationship wasn't what it could have and should have been with either your Dad or your Stepdad.<br /><br />I feel very blessed and lucky to have had a Dad whom I always felt loved by.<br /><br />Hugs to you.Conniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03865193802444007545noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-84194114659111573822011-04-05T22:42:05.110-04:002011-04-05T22:42:05.110-04:00Your post has reminded me about the hidden place t...Your post has reminded me about the hidden place that all my thoughts on father abide. Deep down waiting to come out in bits and pieces as I try and reconcile them with my life. This kernel waiting to pop is wrapped up with religious dogma and memories of marginalization in a patriarchal world. Periodically I pull it out and take a look but right now I'm still too tender for much introspection, in time I'm sure it will finally come out into the light. Thanks! Great blog!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02953440041536434213noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-32115139079807553742011-04-05T22:37:50.869-04:002011-04-05T22:37:50.869-04:00Your post made me realize how much I love my dad. ...Your post made me realize how much I love my dad. Yes he could and was a hard ass to us kids with my mom being the buffer between us. But he did show his love to us many ways and even today he's a great and loving dad.mamahasspokenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18049292242708654609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-51674056713784202102011-04-05T21:51:33.478-04:002011-04-05T21:51:33.478-04:00I got s lot of inspiration to do good form my Dad....I got s lot of inspiration to do good form my Dad. He is still my guide becuase I always wonder what would he have said on a given occasion if he was alive. I get the answers based on how much I knew him. A very nice post.MunirGhiasuddinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05232362559666320301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-2459385407475127362011-04-05T21:49:57.114-04:002011-04-05T21:49:57.114-04:00What insight in your comment and your post. I'...What insight in your comment and your post. I'm sorry your relationship was difficult. Mine was difficult as well, and like you I realized that my dad taught me independence by his actions...and if I hadn't had that independence I'm not sure I'd have made it with three small kids after my hubby died. I'm so very grateful to have had that independence in my life...but it took me 56 years to understand that. I'm 59 now so it was only 3 yrs ago that it finally made sense and I could make peace with it. Life sure is full of surprises...bless you.karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16749464659476217501noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-45900760015648106042011-04-05T21:48:06.168-04:002011-04-05T21:48:06.168-04:00My father died when I was 7 years old, so I don...My father died when I was 7 years old, so I don't really remember having a dad. I dreaded Father's Day because I was the only kid who didn't have a dad back in those days. That said, there were lots of really good dads in our family, thank goodness!Linhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07042143254001890567noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-14535460548986744542011-04-05T19:54:57.970-04:002011-04-05T19:54:57.970-04:00I wasn't close to my dad, but he was a good ma...I wasn't close to my dad, but he was a good man who did the best he could. He died at 57 of emphysema and cirrhosis. Until two years ago my greatest regret was that I left him one night in the hospital and he died alone. Then, when my mother was dying and I was right there with her even though she and I had a very difficult relation, I could feel my dad's presence in the room, and he was proud of me. So maybe he was the person who taught me the value of doing the right thing.Linda Myershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05706455533282204519noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-29368134426993251552011-04-05T19:51:57.580-04:002011-04-05T19:51:57.580-04:00I knew you were going to take my breath away and I...I knew you were going to take my breath away and I came anyway. That my friend is raw emotional writing at its best. You are definitely my hero now.<br /><a href="http://fragilemouse.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow</a>Juleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02136045025997662057noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-68215644154677524012011-04-05T19:37:45.674-04:002011-04-05T19:37:45.674-04:00This is really powerful stuff to have to work thro...This is really powerful stuff to have to work through. My own father's biggest sin was never growing up or taking responsibility, but when he had time to PLAY, he was the best. He died early and I debate the drinking and self-destruction of him... had to work through the sorry fact my life probably turned out better for losing him early, if for superficial reasons, but that is nothing compared to the stuff you are sorting. I'm glad you made a sort of peace before he dies, because whether he deserved it or not, I think you will reach a time you are glad you did your best.Hart Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17599570189253229318noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-82267102241436893582011-04-05T17:51:35.273-04:002011-04-05T17:51:35.273-04:00How very sad. Too bad he never knew what he was mi...How very sad. Too bad he never knew what he was missing. My experience now with the children around us; they are all daddies girls and just love it. I can see how your non-relationship with your dad would color and affect your whole life, but there are many wonderful dads out there, I know two of them personally. I grew up without a father at all, and always wanted one. And you might wish that you had none rather than the one you did. You managed to become a wonderful person in spite of this and rise above it though.Ginny Hartzlerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09329131153403895625noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-40803823946687867452011-04-05T15:36:14.457-04:002011-04-05T15:36:14.457-04:00I'm sorry your father was not there for you. I...I'm sorry your father was not there for you. I have and continue to have a great relationship, and no day passes that I do not thank God for him.Mynehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07595087387069634003noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-65969209047478288942011-04-05T14:04:27.252-04:002011-04-05T14:04:27.252-04:00I'm so sorry that your dad wasn't there fo...I'm so sorry that your dad wasn't there for you. My father was not a bad man and he never did any harm to me deliberately. It was just the way he was that didn't work with the way I was, if that makes any sense. I think he had a lot to do with me leaving Sweden so young. I was in therapy in the years following his death, and I was finally able to forgive him. That was one of the most important things I have done in my life. I could then let him go and at the same time let myself love him for what was good in him.--IngerIngerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02924736131382149056noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-86461976981408394602011-04-05T13:33:16.889-04:002011-04-05T13:33:16.889-04:00I can relate too much to this post. My father left...I can relate too much to this post. My father left by my first birthday never to be seen again. Then my step father molested me for several years. This has affected my life greatly, even in the spiritual matters. I sorry you dad was not there for you. Sending hugs your way.Wanda's Wingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02823654163692296686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-40764469473647651612011-04-05T11:41:23.050-04:002011-04-05T11:41:23.050-04:00It breaks my heart that you had this kind of a man...It breaks my heart that you had this kind of a man for a dad. One day, he will get on his knees to beg for you to forgive him. I can tell you this, our Heavenly Father will right every wrong and that he loves you beyond what we even know is love. Sending you a BIG hug. :DJulie Harwardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05246850029056713294noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-76146569973934674202011-04-05T11:13:46.354-04:002011-04-05T11:13:46.354-04:00It's amazing how our relationships with our fa...It's amazing how our relationships with our fathers..or lack of...shape us. I have several daddy issues that I blame him for in my lack of being able to have relationships or trust men...but I try to remember that my dad did his best and thought what he was doing was right. Still, scars run deep. <br />I'm sorry about your feelings towards your father but as long as you turned out ok...then all is good?!?!? right?!?!?Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01640871678908297706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-5574054176312788512011-04-05T09:45:01.015-04:002011-04-05T09:45:01.015-04:00Tracy, it shows much courage to write this. I'...Tracy, it shows much courage to write this. I'm sure it helps you to try and understand and come to terms with the relationship you had with your father. <br /><br />Some men should not be fathers - they don't have that gene, for some reason. My first husband is that man. I'm sorry for what you had to go through. I hope you are able to put this time of your life in perspective and move on. :)Nancyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06116903234641971344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-11360191759862854952011-04-05T09:43:06.851-04:002011-04-05T09:43:06.851-04:00When I saw the title and old photo, I thought this...When I saw the title and old photo, I thought this was going to be one of those huggy, feely posts honoring a wonderful man. How open and honest are you to make it not so. <br /><br />I had a not-so-close relationship with my father too. When he wasn't drinking, he was extremely quiet - present but not involved. When he was drinking, he was loud, obnoxious, sometimes frightening, and I usually went to my room as soon as meals were over... There wasn't much affection shared between father and children in our household (and even my mother was not the huggy, touchy soul). <br /><br />Thanks for being honest. Certainly brought up a lot of unresolved angst in my own heart today...TexWisGirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15510099344729038541noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-85273508202964636282011-04-05T09:40:20.491-04:002011-04-05T09:40:20.491-04:00No greater love for us is that of our heavenly fat...No greater love for us is that of our heavenly father GOD, after all he sent Jesus to die for us. Give him your life and see if he does not ease your mind. I lived in fear of my earthly father, he treated us like his men under him in the military. No affection, just sternness when he was home on leave. I seldom saw my father till he retired and by that time I was 18. We had nothing to say to each other. But I was there for them, doing and showing I still cared. After knowing more about him and what he lived through I saw him in a different light. God revealed to me all that my earthly father went through for me. His last few years on this earth I was able to connect with him a bit closer. I was able to tell him I loved him and that was only after the heavenly father revealed his love for me. I only pray I will one day hear my father call me by his pet name he had for me. <br /><br />Keeping you in my prayers.Tammy@Simple Southern Happinesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01027582211262125136noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-49761614887873438652011-04-05T09:33:26.533-04:002011-04-05T09:33:26.533-04:00I'm a little overwhelmed with thoughts right n...I'm a little overwhelmed with thoughts right now. There are so many tales such as yours out there. My sisters and I had a great dad and my sons have a great dad. I am grateful.<br /><br />Best,<br />BonnieFrom the Kitchenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00789641912016566894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-20109683367126775942011-04-05T09:04:17.938-04:002011-04-05T09:04:17.938-04:00I hope your children are able to have a great fath...I hope your children are able to have a great father figure in their lives.<br /><br />this was a great post....as always.Margaret (Peggy or Peg too)https://www.blogger.com/profile/04247428494327269983noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4231905524448702799.post-15813106478271882952011-04-05T08:37:42.108-04:002011-04-05T08:37:42.108-04:00This is a very honest and thoughtful post and it t...This is a very honest and thoughtful post and it touched me in a tender spot. My father (and my mother) died when I was 18. We had not had a bad relationship, but we had not had a close one either. There are so many things I wish I could have tried to resolve with him as an adult.Jeaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04810126999695733332noreply@blogger.com