Happy Valentine's Day~

the Spaine family, 2005

“All you need is love, all you need is love,

All you need is love, love, love is all you need…”

…to quote the infamous Beatles, who can argue with that thought, right? Or ‘Love is what makes the world go ‘round’? Blah, blah blah…


On this day of love taking center stage; thank you Hallmark, I felt compelled to address a side of love that no one mentions and my guess is no one even considers. The concept of-


-receiving love~


If you know about me I am neither shy nor guarded in talking about my tumultuous childhood. In fact I’ve come to peace with the events as well as the people responsible because those are the proceedings that shaped my personhood and I rather like who I’ve become; strong, confident, compassionate, creative to name a few qualities.


However, to receive love had at all times been extremely complex for me since my training in life led me to equivocate kindness and love with abuse of my body, my feelings, and my life. I denied myself food because I wasn’t deserving of its nutrients. When someone offered me a gift, or a kind word I shunned them because the debt of thankfulness was too immense. In fact, the first time the man who is now my husband told me he loved me I stared him straight in the eye and said, ‘Don’t ever say that unless you mean it!’


Enter Barbara, Martha and Tanya; my guardian angels--my therapists at vital crossroads who truly bestowed life and rescued me with their love, dedication and commitment. Just as important these astounding women who acted as a surrogate mother at various points in time, taught me to accept gestures and expressions of love with gratefulness and gratitude.


I’ve recently been in touch with these amazing ladies when it became necessary to complete the ‘Acknowledgement’ page for my book. I could never deny their impact on me and the person I’ve become. I will remain forever indebted to them as I carry their spirit and strength with me in every cell of my being.


So on this Valentine’s Day, it is with fortitude to each: Barbara, Martha and Tanya that I’ve learned to receive love in its many forms with an open heart.

“For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.”

By Ivan Panin



Time Wasted....

Time is precious. Time is limited. Time is free and ours to use as we desire whether we prefer to spend time with our family, exercising, baking or shopping, etc…time is what shapes our lives.

Most often we believe we have too little time as evidenced by the harried over-scheduling of ourselves and our children, stressed out family members frequenting drive by fast food restaurants rather than sitting down together as a family and partaking in a home cooked meal and actually sharing the day’s events.

One parent is crazily driving to dance instruction or scouts with one kid, at the same time as the other parent is madly maneuvering soccer practice or band, or religion or after school events. That is assuming they are an element of a two parent family unit with two children. What about the single parent family with more children heading off in various directions?

You are currently chuckling and chortling while nodding your head because you know what I’m talking about- you’ve been a victim of these circumstances more moments than not. I presume within the most recent week you’ve experienced these precise happenings. We certainly have had our share.

Many questions abound such as to why we feel compelled to over-schedule ourselves? Why do we insist on stressing ourselves out when we have choices? Does this life of pressure, tension and anxiety enhance the quality of our lives?

As each person is responsible for answering those questions for themselves and their family, I think I’ll just sit back for the next three weeks as I am ‘tracked out’. This is one of the luxuries of teaching in a year round school; I have time off every nine weeks to rest, relax and rejuvenate. Ahhh, I can ponder what activity will fill my minutes …will it be curling up with a book? Perhaps watching an old movie, definitely writing or taking my son to the driving range?

Ummm, maybe we’ll go for a walk at Umstead Park and we won't forget the camera since the weather is going to be lovely here all week. (See for yourself !)We could possibly scrapbook, or play hockey or go bowling? Whatever activity we choose to engage in I will keep the following thought in mind…

“The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.” By Bertrand Russell

 

a note from Miss Angel-Kitty~

Hey Y'All,
It's me, Miss Angel-Kitty!  ...like that?

As you know, or perhaps you need to be reminded as I did that I am a Southern Belle and like all Southern Ladies the term 'Miss' is in front of their name so I now want to be referred to as Miss Angel-Kitty! I think I like the sounds of that~

Anyway, I am filling in this morning for my Nee Nee because she is dealing with the Creepy-Crud as she calls it. She said her kids gave it to her at school. Well, I do declare, such nice children to give her things so special. Did you hear my newly acquired Southern accent as I said that? Well, please listen more carefully next time, will you?

So...as I was saying, Nee Nee is sick and she is fretting about not making it around to your house for a proper visit, however she did mention that a spot of tea would do just the trick for her throat. Although you truly wouldn't want her cough or her sneezes; sometimes I can't tell the difference so I can express a right nice 'Bless you' to my Nee Nee.

So I do aim to head on out of here and fixin' to get my much needed beauty rest. You know a girl can never have enough. (wink-wink)

Go Hog-Wild and have a fabulous Day!

Pages of my Life...

When anxious, uneasy and bad thoughts come, I go to the sea, and the sea drowns them out with its great wide sounds, cleanses me with its noise and imposes a rhythm upon everything in me that is bewildered and confused.

It's been a very pleasurable weekend as I spent some time scrapbooking and living vicariously through memories of our moments spent at our favorite vacation spot: Emerald Isle. So for your viewing pleasure, please find below sprinklings  of well, 'Beachin' it!' although I took the photo with the spread backwards. Oh well...you get the picture!

No Hurricane in sight~a lovely day!



Beach Bocce Ball...



Playing...

At the fishing pier~

Shark!!! ..thank God it wasn't a big one, but big enough!

Sights and Sounds of the Sea...

Speed Racer...


Rejoice with your family in the beautiful land of life!



Instant Replay!

I was feeling particulary melancholy yesterday about the world's trevails and enjoyed reading the comments from everyone. I also agree that sensationalism is alive and well in the good ol' USA, as well as violence perpetrated by video games and movies which is why our sone never gets to play  or watch any of those. Call me old-fashioned but our kid will not have that type of mentality and he doesn't.

Anyway, I recall one of my very first posts being of this topic so I went back and read it and decided since I didn't know most of you, nor did you know me, I would post it again. In my mind's eye, I can actually see God performing this antic and who would blame Him?

June, 2010
As a teacher, this is an extremely hectic overwhelming STRESSFUL time of year! What’s more, the inundation of tasks that need to be accomplished in teaching in a year round school is compounded when one year ends and eight days later, we inaugurate a brand new school year. Both tasks are complicated in their own right, however when the two are combined, life can be enormously stressful. Have I mentioned how stressful this can be? So suffice it to say, I feel challenged to have a few coherent thoughts at this point in time which makes writing taxing in a way it never has been before. Nonetheless, I’ve been waiting for this moment; Saturday to be precise when I can sit and pen the thoughts continually swirling in my head.



One persistent prevailing thought accompanied me on my walk this morning along with the sweltering heat and drops of sweat beads dangling off my eyelids. I was really quite amused at the idea. With all the global atrocities occurring; the Gulf oil spill, the War in Iraq and Afghanistan, suffering incurred by sickness and disease, poverty, the state of our education systems just to name a few in the headlines of today’s news, my question is this…

Does God ever want to make a sweeping motion across the world and declare, ‘DO-OVER?’

*****

Then, a song which is one of my favorites came to mind so here is the link of this lovely lady Charice who is seventeen years old; singing a powerful song... ENJOY~

(I tried to upload the vieo but it wasn't available so please take time to go on youtube and listen. I promise you will enjoy it tremendously!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4Xd435coD4

Why must there be so much hate?

Doesn’t there seem to be an abundance of HATE in the world today? It appears to be lurking globally based on the news in Egypt, Jordan, Sudan, and of course Afghanistan as well as the Tragedy in Tucson to name a few. Hate prowls on our local street corners with murder, hi-jacking, gangs, shooting deaths, child abuse and most pronounced to me is the bullying that occurs amongst our children.

I don’t proclaim to discern the solution to this quandary of revulsion and abhorrence; the inability to tolerate the views of other individuals or clusters of folk. I could go into a legion of ways to solve the evils but that appears futile.

However, what I do recognize is extreme dislike is not a new concept to me evidenced of this poem I penned back when I was a youngster of seventeen. I might have written the same words forty plus years later.

 

"Hate"

February, 1977

jabbing, frigidly cold,

loneliness, fear

black, darkness

unpleasant, striking

dirty, cluttered

hard, blaring, loud

harsh, sour

yelling, wailing, running, leading to

DEATH-

"Those who hate most fervently must have once loved deeply; those who want to deny the world must have once embraced what they now set on fire.”

Kurt Tucholsky

Poetry of Old...

April, 1978

Yesterday

we laughed

in the rain,

We ran and jumped,

we danced

through puddled

in bare feet.

You held my hand.

...that was yesterday.

Today...

it's sunny~