Saturday, June 23, 2012

‘GUILTY!!…’ the jury revealed...


I refuse to display his photo as it would ‘dirty’ my blog. However, by now, I’m certain you’ve caught a glimpse of evil…the sinful face of Jerry Sandusky, although as the verdict was read he didn’t appear so haughty, did he?

Jerry—also the name of my stepfather who sexually abused me. So if you can envision the memories evoked within as the Penn State Scandal went viral in November and the case of Sandusky was brought to light.  Unknowingly with each news clip or mention of the name my heart dove into the recollection abyss.

Memories of late night fondling’s came flooding back as well as the precise moment as a teenager upon hearing the definition of a virgin and knowing in my heart of hearts that I wasn’t. Rarely was I able to leave for college without enduring a longing kiss that should only be meant for intimate partners.

The victims of Sandusky are courageous souls whose lives have been distorted and forever detoured by the sadistic and self-absorbed deeds of a once-trusted individual. I for one admire and significantly appreciate the strength each possessed to express their truths in a public forum, particularly with accusations of ulterior motives of financial gain.

In life each experience shapes us. Those of us who have endured sexual abuse know facets of our lives reflect those actions against our innocence; a lack of trust of others, depression, eating disorders and a general dis-connect to the world.

But on this day with a verdict of G-U-I-L-T-Y, justice is being served on a golden platter, and with this, may ALL the “Jerry’s” of the world rot in hell.

“Even if things don't unfold the way you expected, don't be disheartened or give up. One who continues to advance will win in the end.”
By Daisaku Ikeda

39 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

i have hated going to msn.com today because he face is front and center. however, i am glad it is there, now, for the right reasons.

God bless every one that was brave enough to come forward. and may those that knew / witnessed and remained silent be haunted by their role in these people's lives forever.

Jennifer Forbes said...

Oh dear Tracy,

I'm so sorry that this animals actions has brought up such horrible memories for you with what he's done to his son and those other children.... he is inhuman.

I wish there were words that I could say that could take away the pain that you are feeling right now, friend. I wish the same for those poor boys and their families.

Wishing you peace and sending you hugs.

Kea said...

It's been international news, of course, so I had heard the verdict and feel that, at least for once, justice has prevailed.

Will the guards let him loose in prison and turn their backs? That could/would be "an eye for an eye" and all that.

Sending you cyber hugs and universal Light and Blessings, for YOUR peace.

Jaime Finch said...

You are a very brave woman, whose pain will help someone else not feel so alone. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

Tracy,
I am repulsed at what you had to endure. It is my hope that the more you open up and share with those of us who love you, the more "healed" you become.
I am glad the Jerrys of the world get/got what they deserve.
XO
Dianna

M said...

I flipped him teh bird when he appeared on TV last night. So sad for those who have not come forward and are hiding the memories. Glad you have persevered! Go girl!!

Ginny said...

God is completely just, and these people will be judged. They have ruined the lives of so many.Take heart, Tracy, you have come through the worst and are shining like a star now.

mare ball said...

So sorry for what you have suffered. God will bring justice to the guilty. I, too, pray that you will continue to find healing with those who love you.

Finding Pam said...

Tracy, there are so many evil people out there. I wish the catholic priest would be held accountable. Of course we know that God will hold them accountable.

Like the others said, I am so sorry that you had to endure such horrible things at the hand of someone that is suppose to love you. Such a huge betrayal.

Keep the faith and stay strong.

Mamma has spoken said...

The thing that got me was the wife saying what she said. Makes me wonder if she was in deep denial especially since one of his adopted sons has come forward and says he did it to them too.
The thing that I get comfort from is knowing what will happen to him in prison.
Hope and pray that not only his victims heal from the abuse but also you. But I know even with healing, there will be a scar.

Maple Lane said...

I am thankful that this evil manipulator is where he belongs and can no longer hurt any one. May God bless you and all of those hurt by such a man.

Sue said...

My wicked stepfather was physically and verbally abusive, though not sexually. When I tried to get help for myself and my brother, people in the town told me what a wonderful guy he was and I must be mistaken.

I'm glad Sandusky will have a long time to think about his misdeeds. I only wish someone had stepped up to stop my stepfather.

Daisy said...

Tracy, I'm so sorry that this case in the news has stirred up these bad memories for you. I can't imagine how that must feel to you. Sending good thoughts and hugs your way.

*Sheila* said...

I heard on the news that his sentence could be between 60 and 440 years. The point being that he would never be free again. At age 68 he may serve perhaps 20 years? before he dies. His victims have been serving a life sentence since they were small boys. I hope he is not given protective custody, and the general prison population can mete out their own brand of justice.

Out on the prairie said...

I work with a few predators and have a hard time being nice to them.

Esther Joy said...

I, too, was glad to hear that verdict!

Old Kitty said...

My thoughts and prayers to all the survivors - may their lives be full of joy, peace and love now that this man is behind bars. Take care
x

welcome to my world of poetry said...

I don't know the person you write of but he dosen't sound a very noce person.

Have a peaceful Sunday.
Yvonne.

Catherine said...

Sending you big hugs Tracy!
xo Catherine

Teresa Coltrin@Journaling Woman said...

Children are a precious commodity. It's never ok to abuse or neglect them. I have no patience with people who hurt children.

T

Sandra said...

sorry to hear your story and to know this story on TV has brought back memories you rather forget. it is good to share them. my neighbor is 76, she told me when she was 69 about her abusive father, we went to church and she cried and on the way home she shared her story with me, she was 69 and had never told anyone at all about the abuse, not until she told me. that is really sad, because she held it in her whole life.

Heather said...

sending love your way! YES justice is being served!!!!!!!!

Tina Fariss Barbour said...

God bless you, Tracy, for going through hell and being courageous enough to write about it and be open about. I'm sorry that that SOB's name brought up bad memories for you. Maybe for this man, justice will be served. God bless all his victims, too, and may healing abound!

Love and hugs,
Tina

Inger said...

Thank you for sharing your story, you are brave and I hope it helps you. I am so relieved that this monster is now going to spend the rest of his life in prison.

Susie Swanson said...

Tracy I'm so sorry for what you had to endure and the fact that this case brought it back to you so fresh..I can't even imagine what that must be like..But you are a brave person and I pray it helps you..Thaks for sharing with us..Susie

browndogcbr said...

Delayed justice...finally.

Mike said...

We'll see how he holds up in prison. Convicts do not like child abusers. aka Chomos. (I used to work at a prison) He'll really get his just reward, now.

This reminds me of the young Texas father who, recently, beat a man to death after catching him molesting his. The Grand Jury's decision? "No bill. Justice is served."

Just Be Real said...

Tracy thank you for "your voice" in this matter. Hugs to you my dear.....

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

I'm sorry you had to endure this. I'm sorry anyone has to endure this.
I can't fathom.

I hope the media leaves the victims alone. They did what needed to be done. Now let them move on.

Hugs to you and your voice.

Farida of In Love With Sunflower said...

May you be comforted, Ms Tracy in our Lord's arms as you entrust your life to Him. Continue staying strong. You are blessed to have a beautiful family :D

Chatty Crone said...

Amen to what you said and I hope the victims will one day be stronger and stronger. And there are other types of abuse - it all hurts. sandie

Maggie said...

healing and hope to all those affected by this sort of sick experience

krystal lynn said...

I am so disgusted by him AND by the people who protected him and allowed the abuse to continue - I think they are as guilty as he is. My brother was sexually abused by a man who was a Boy Scout leader..he (my brother) committed suicide a few years ago and I just grieve for him and everyone who has had to endure abuse of any kind.

Buttons said...

I am so sorry you had to endure this no child should have to endure this. I admire the bravery of everyone that can come forward and stop this horrible betrayal of trust. I will not mention that horrible mans name he does not deserve it. HUGS to you and all other silent and not silent victims. Your comments made me sad there is so much pain out there. HUG B

LTM said...

oh, Tracy. What a terrible, horrible thing you had to endure. It makes me so sad to hear stories like this. But the truth is, the best way to fight this is with knowledge. You are wonderfully brave, and here's to getting these horrible offenders behind bars~ <3 ((hugs)) to you. You're a courageous soul.

Tina said...

You are very brave!
It always amazes me how our minds and memories work when it comes to things like that.

Annmarie Pipa said...

I am so sorry this happened to you, and all the other many victims. terrible.

Madi and Mom said...

Tracy I'm so very very sorry for you but say Bravo for picking yourself up and not letting it define you.

God Bless my sweet friend.
C

Pat Tillett said...

I'm also a victim of a ruined childhood. For this and other reasons. I don't think these evil idiots have any idea (or maybe they just don't care) about how much they screw up the lives of their victims. It takes a long time to recover and come to terms with what happened. I have a pretty strong stance on the subject now. I think animals like Sandusky need a bullet between the eyes. I don't want to pay taxes to support and animal like him in prison. Sorry! I'll put the soapbox away now... I'm sorry for what you had to endure as a child.