Monday, July 2, 2012

Who said you can't get anything for free!

Life through the Eyes of a Hurricane: Doggie-Dog!


The 12-Step Program

 Okay, I’m a lost and broken dog. I have a terrible confession: I have a sock fetish, which according to the dictionary means an obsessive or unhealthy preoccupation or attachment with an object.

 But there, I said it . . . and often heard that the first step in overcoming an addiction is to admit I have a problem. It is a terrible problem. I can’t get enough socks, which is even more of a problem because they aren’t my socks!

 Well, they eventually become my socks because I chew and tear so many holes in them that no one can wear the foot coverings by time I’m done with them, but that’s beside the point.

 You see, they are my family’s socks. I can’t help it and I am so ashamed of myself. Whenever I see a sock in the laundry basket I have to go grab it, stretch it until I hear that priceless sound:  ripping. AAHHHH, a sound of satisfaction! Tear it, shred it, and grate it; that is when they are at their best!

 Even though Big D has tucked them deep into the toe of the shoe, I like to get into Big Daddy’s running shoes. I stick my nose into the cavernous shoe until I can reach just a teensy-weensy thread and pull it out. Yeah, I know, the smell is pretty unpleasant and you’d think that would deter me, but I guess that indicates how desperate my dilemma is.

 I’ve even been known to chase Little Daddy around the house when he’s taking his shoes off so I can grab a sliver of the cloth and help in pulling it off his foot. If I do that, then at least the taste is in my mouth and there’s a better chance I get to keep it since I put the entire sock in my jawbone and slobber all over it. They don’t like to touch it when it is coated with dribble.

 Then, I dash into my favorite upstairs hiding place: under the bed. I know, I know, I’m a big dog but I can still fit under the bed and no one comes in after me. The beauty of that is they know I have the upper hand, so they go to the cabinet in the bathroom to get a biscuit to entice me to come out. When I hear that box, I immediately go to my bed, the heck with the sock!―a quest for a later time and date. Besides, I have the best of both worlds: a biscuit AND the sock!

 Yes, it is true. I go to great lengths to feed my addiction. I follow Nee Nee up the stairs biting at her heals until she gives them up, or until I trip her. Sorry, Nee Nee! Or, I stand on my hind legs at the washer and dryer searching for strays, and park myself politely at the dryer while clothes are being folded to quickly grab one that may fall on the floor. I’m getting pretty good at Snatch-and-Go’s.
Now, if you want to know how the story finishes, go to Amazon.com to download the book Life through the Eyes of a Hurricane: Doggie-Dog! This e-book will be free for this week ONLY! (SAle ends Saturday, July 7.
So tell your friends, tell your neighbors and tell your relatives that there is something free in life.
Fellow bloggers; post the information on your blog if you want to help me promote my book~




61 comments:

Tamara Ward said...

I love this blog! And a sock fetish is much tamer than other things you could be into... like a eating grass fetish.

Tina Fariss Barbour said...

Oh, Hurricane, poor boy to be dealing with this sock addiction. Do you think you would feel the same way about socks if you had some of your own? :-)

I'm so excited about the book, and the giveaway!

Linda Reeder said...

How funny, and not funny, and aggravating, and hilarious. No wonder you wrote a book about that dog.

Pat Tillett said...

I think I'm going to get and read it! Life from a dogs point of view...

mare ball said...

Cute. If I was attached to socks instead of chocolate, I'd be a lot better off. :-)

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Wonderful post. Most enjoyable to read.

Yvonne.

Old Kitty said...

Awwwwww so you have a thing for socks! Yay for you!! Enjoy!! Take care
x

Peggy K said...

I Facebooked it. (More visibility than my blog!)

Sally said...

It is also available free on Amazon UK!! Hooray and thank you for the free download.

Mamma has spoken said...

My littlest dog comes running whenever she hears the toenail clippers just so she can eat the cuttings.
Go ahead and saw eeeeeewwwwwwwuuuuu!

Arkansas Patti said...

Had to laugh at Hurricane's addiction. Mighty dog's is worm jerky, grass and dirt.
Good idea for the "free" week. The "E" writers I know about all swear the best way to sell is to give away first.

Out on the prairie said...

Many times people offer an old shoe or clothing for a toy not realizing you gave them the scent to look for more.Hope there is a cure.

Happy Days said...

LOL, silly dog! My new pup has a pashion for paper. He chews the toilet paper, newspaper, magazines...he is a perfect paper shredder!!...debbie

M said...

Sounds like a great book! Can I download it even if I do not have a kindle or e-book thing? I only have a laptop.

I once had a cat who stole socks...from a neighbor's laundry room...tons of them. They were not amused!

anthony stemke said...

Very interesting. Our dog (Lucy) just likes to eat treats (everytime she goes out, when she returns she gets a treat. Funny though the size of the treat determines how MANY times she barks to go out) and a meal that has a little fat applied on top. She is very polite and doean't chew inappropriate items. She will sit and stare at you while you are eating, but if you get up and leave the table for whatever reason, she makes no attempt to steal your food.
Had a puppy once (Sweetie) who chewed everything, even a rare old bible. If you let her out without a chain she would steal neighbours items and bring them home, like a steel bbq grill brush or something.
I enjoyed reading the narrative.

Maggie said...

awwww- a sock fetish isn't so bad =)
a bit smelly maybe!
cute pooch

Wanda's Wings said...

He so cute!

Daisy said...

Fun post, Tracy. Our dog likes socks too, but I think Hurricane has him beat by quite a bit! Very cool about the free e-book! I hope it earns you more fans for your book!! :-D

krystal lynn said...

our dog Zoe loved socks over the toys we bought her. Thanks for the free book.

Writer Pat Newcombe said...

Socks aint so bad... depends what they smell of?? Ugh!! Good luck with the book.

Farida of In Love With Sunflower said...

Both the young and the young at heart will surely enjoy reading this. Break a leg and God bless!

Jennifer Forbes said...

I had a dog who liked to lick toes, maybe they were related :)

Connie Arnold said...

That's so cute and sounds so much like a dog! Please let me know if you'd like me to do a review of the book and post on my blog.

*Sheila* said...

Hurricane we all have addictions, mine is chocolate, and since that is bad for dogs, you are wise to stick to socks. Less fattening too!
Our family once had a dog to liked to chew shoes, he never outgrew it. AND they were only ever my shoes!
hugs xx

Annmarie Pipa said...

I think my kids would enjoy this book. we just got our dog 2 weeks ago.

Sherry Ellis said...

Love your dog! Mine has a shoe fettish. LOL!

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Gina Gao said...

This is a great post! The dog is so cute!

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Judy Harper said...

I wish I had found this before July 7th! I would have posted and read!

Stacey said...

Love this! We foster many dogs through an Alabama rescue and MANY of our homeless dogs we foster LOVE LOVE LOVE socks!

cleemckenzie said...

As fetishes go, this one isn't too bad. Our dog Jake tore shingles off the house whenever there was a loud noise. Imagine 4th of July around our place!

I'll put your cover on my blog. Looks like a super book.

Maria said...

my dog loves to chew my flip flops all the time. looking forward in reading this book

Mike said...

Your dog is really funny, well my pup has a habit of sleeping in my lap for hours while im reading a book.

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