Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day~

the Spaine family, 2005
“All you need is love, all you need is love,

All you need is love, love, love is all you need…”

…to quote the infamous Beatles, who can argue with that thought, right? Or ‘Love is what makes the world go ‘round’? Blah, blah blah…


On this day of love taking center stage; thank you Hallmark, I felt compelled to address a side of love that no one mentions and my guess is no one even considers. The concept of-


-receiving love~


If you know about me I am neither shy nor guarded in talking about my tumultuous childhood. In fact I’ve come to peace with the events as well as the people responsible because those are the proceedings that shaped my personhood and I rather like who I’ve become; strong, confident, compassionate, creative to name a few qualities.


However, to receive love had at all times been extremely complex for me since my training in life led me to equivocate kindness and love with abuse of my body, my feelings, and my life. I denied myself food because I wasn’t deserving of its nutrients. When someone offered me a gift, or a kind word I shunned them because the debt of thankfulness was too immense. In fact, the first time the man who is now my husband told me he loved me I stared him straight in the eye and said, ‘Don’t ever say that unless you mean it!’


Enter Barbara, Martha and Tanya; my guardian angels--my therapists at vital crossroads who truly bestowed life and rescued me with their love, dedication and commitment. Just as important these astounding women who acted as a surrogate mother at various points in time, taught me to accept gestures and expressions of love with gratefulness and gratitude.


I’ve recently been in touch with these amazing ladies when it became necessary to complete the ‘Acknowledgement’ page for my book. I could never deny their impact on me and the person I’ve become. I will remain forever indebted to them as I carry their spirit and strength with me in every cell of my being.


So on this Valentine’s Day, it is with fortitude to each: Barbara, Martha and Tanya that I’ve learned to receive love in its many forms with an open heart.


“For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.”
By Ivan Panin



36 comments:

texwisgirl said...

What a wonderful thought from a different perspective... :)

Angela Felsted said...

This is beautiful.

Brian said...

I loved your story today. Happy Valentine's Day to you too!

Out on the prairie said...

Very nicely written.Love can be very complex for people to share.

Jules said...

I must say this has been the best Valentine's post I have read. Receiving love is a difficult thing at times, thank you for pointing that out today.

With a warm, true heart... Happy Valentine's Day!
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Bossy Betty said...

Wonderful quote and lots to think about with this post.

Happy Valentine's Day to you!

LTM said...

what a wonderful post. And you're right. Receiving love can sometimes be more difficult. So glad you've got these three amazing ladies in your life~ :o) <3

Ginny said...

So these three incredible women are kind of your cupids, because they opened up your capicity to recieve love, how wonderful!!! I think it is hard for many to receive love or compliments or presents. It is much easier for me to give. It seems that your past has made you a very strong and insightful person.

JennyD said...

I really liked this. Receiving is just as important as giving and it takes a special person to show that in the true meaning of love. You did just that, Tracy. Proud of ya, girl. You don't know it, but I empathize with much that you feel and probably will never rectify it as you have, but I can certainly amaze and be happy in your results. Yay for vicarious living! :D
xoxoxo Happy Valentine's Day, Tracy

Daisy said...

A thought-provoking and heartwarming post, Tracy. Wishing you a happy Valentine's Day. :)

Old Kitty said...

How lovely!!!! Thank you for sharing a most life-affirming post about the healing power of love as embodied by Barbara, Martha, Tanya and you!! You are all amazing women! Happy Valentine's! Take care
x

Arkansas Patti said...

Proud of your journey and so happy that your had such loving spirits who guided you from who you were to who you are.
Wonderful post.
Happy Valentines Day to you and your beautiful family.

Teresa Evangeline said...

A very thoughtful post and a lovely gift to all of us. You're openness is inspiring. Happy Valentine's Day to you and your guys!

Sweet Old Vintage said...

Hi.. there certainly is allot of beauty and happines in this world but so many times all we see is the bad and ugly in our news coverage we forget all the wonderful things and happenings that surround us... I look for the good every day as it makes my day much more enjoyable... It is too easy to dwell on the other.... I prefer the blessings....

Catherine... said...

I popped in from Sophia's blog...I love your opening quote "Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid into heavens gate sideways, totally worn out, shouting '..holy sh*t ....what a ride!" It made me LOL....and jangled some cobwebs...thank you....I hope you don't mind...but I'm going to use your quote...when ever I can....

Pat Tillett said...

Tracy, this was beautiful! I'm glad you posted this, it makes me think back to the "angel" that I owe everyting to.
Happy Valentine's Day...

Donea Lee said...

It's so wonderful that you have 3 supportive, caring women in your life that mean so much! Love is wonderful thing to give AND to receive. Happy v-day to you ~ :)

The Words Crafter said...

I understand your story all too well. It has taken me YEARS to learn to accept....nearly anything positive. Good for you. Good for us. Happy Valentine's Day!

Stuff could be worse said...

I am so happy that you had guardian angels, at the right time! Happy Valentines Day
kim

amy said...

I know what you mean. I'm glad you had guardian angels--we all need them. Love that quote from Ivan Panin. Beautiful.

Mamma has spoken said...

What a nice tribute to your guardian angels!

Catherine said...

Your words are clearly from your heart and written with such compassion. There are indeed angels all around us ~ we just have to let them in.

Beautiful post Tracy!
xo Catherine

PEA said...

Happy Valentine's Day, Tracy:-) Thank you so much for dropping by my blog and leaving such a lovely comment, I always enjoy meeting new bloggers!!

So many people think that receiving love is so easy to do but it's not as easy as they think. I'm glad that you were able to overcome the obstacles stopping you from accepting it...thank God for the guardian angels in our lives:-) xo

LV said...

Loved and enjoyed your love feature today. I am a big customer of Hallmark stores.

MOLLYE said...

Hi Tracy I too can relate and I have a story of recovery on my original blog which explains it. Truly a gift to be able to love yourself enough to accept the love of others. Bless you, Mollye

Bobbi said...

What a beautiful post!! Happy Valentines Day Tracy - Thank you for sharing...

Dawn said...

Great post...love that last quote.
Hope your day was wonderful...and you have a great new week!

Nancy@A Rural Journal said...

Thanks for sharing with us Tracy. You are an inspiration to those who may be going through the same difficulties right now.

Peggy K said...

I love what you said about your life experiences being a part of who you are. I think I'll need to write that in my little notebook to go back and read from time to time. So inspiring!!
Isn't it just wonderful to find those guardian angels who pop into our lives now and then? And even more wonderful when we REALIZE they are our angels!!

Andrea said...

The beautiful stained glass window on arise 2 write was in a church near the coast of NC. My husband and I visited during the Christmas season with friends who have family in that area. I took a picture of the window b/c it was so beautiful.

Blessings,
andrea

Jim said...

This was lovely Tracy! How great was it for you to 'meet' these three incredible women when you needed them. A lovely tribute and a wonderful sentiment to share. Thanks.

Tiggeriffic said...

This is a Tiggeriffic Post.. Well written~! My guardian angels have lost all their feathers several times and they are now in the process of growing back in.. I need to be more careful~!
Have a great day~! ta ta for now from Iowa:)

Susan Fields said...

What a beautiful and honest post. It sounds like these ladies were indeed your guardian angels.

Ami said...

It sounds like people are continuing to shape your life... but in a positive direction. And with love.

What a beautiful post.

Julie Musil said...

What a beautiful, meaningful post. I'm so glad these people were in your life when you needed them, and I'm really glad your husband showed you what love is all about.

Sophia said...

Thank you for sharing a piece of you with us. So humbled. LOVE you to pieces! YOU ARE a beautiful person, inside and out. BIG hugs! =)