Friday, November 19, 2010

A Trip to the Past….and a Tribute!

a high schooler...
 The well worn yellowed pages with a rusty staple clinging to the corner , remnants of ink smudges on erasable typing paper and a musty odor that hovers with aged paper; verification of years gone by…thirty four years to be exact.

Linda Stoner was my freshman and sophomore English teacher who had a penchant for creative writing. Unbeknownst to me she thought I could conquer and triumph this seemingly insurmountable task or perhaps she just sensed my perpetual state of sadness; at least it seemed to me with her soothing words and gentle prompts.

I unhurriedly began supplying her slips of notebook paper that carefully conveyed skillfully handwritten poetry that wouldn’t reveal too much of my inner makings. One by one, she’d return the dispensing of my heart with words of encouragement or suggestions I could do to enhance my writings.

This morning I crawled into our closet to search for the prose tucked away in a 1976 folder displaying multihued ragdolls with blissful expressions. The file was entitled ‘Psychology’ carefully designed to be a disguise for my inscriptions. Upon opening the sleeve, I became twelve, fourteen, and sixteen once again explicitly disclosing those words.

Below are a few examples of those raw early writings and unedited... as difficult as that was:

Poem 1~

Butterflies represent change and growth.
Growth at one’s own personal level and inner self.
A Caterpillar transforms into a butterfly
A butterfly…

Poem 2~

This was dedicated to my Grandpa who had died…
As I sit and watch the ocean
It appears to be calm, but it isn’t always.
I notice the sea gulls, waiting in anticipation
Of something-food, a storm, perhaps a companion.
They watch me closely,
As if in some way, I would provide for their needs.
In the west, the sun begins to set,
Losing its brightness like a burned out fire.
The tide inches in toward me.
I feel it’s closeness as it caresses the rock
Upon which I sit.
The splashes feel like cold tear drops
Against my arms and face.
The sky, which was once blue jeweled with the sun setting
Is turning a dark grey.
Clouds rumbling like the rushing waves.
It’s getting late now.
The tide’s moving again.
I feel cold and lonely as it ebbs away.
Losing the tide’s closeness
Waiting for it to reappears
Soft and calm.

I reflect upon my writing; past and present. Visibly I’m not a world renowned author who is on Oprah’s Book Club or the New York Times Best Seller list; however I AM swollen with pride and gratified with the progression of my past-time.

For this, I thank Linda Stoner, wherever she may be that she challenged and presented me an outlet for the angst of a teenage girl. When My Life as a Dog… is published this spring, I will honor her place in my life; a true beginning... Thank you Mrs. Stoner!


Kittie Howard said...

What you wrote years ago is as beautiful today as it was then. The poem about your grandfather is exquisite, lovely words from the heart as only youth can write. And remembering your teacher, you have a big, loving heart that touches everyone. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Anonymous said...

I loved her as a teacher too...She really cared about and respected her students....& obviously she saw something in you that no one else had to that point..isn't it amazing where we find the people who inspire us?? And I'm sure she never realized how her kindness would bear fruit

Teresa Evangeline said...

A good teacher can make all the difference. I'm so glad you felt that you could share these early writings with us. I can't call up that much courage...yet. Kudos to you and your ability to trust. Quite an achievement. Very nice.

Tracy said...

Thank you Kitty for such kind words...ahhh, when I was a youth I thought I'd publish a poetry book, however life got in the way...
Many Blessings to you and your family as well!

Anonymous, I wonder if we told her how much we appreciated all that she did and was for us? Most likely not, but it is amazing the places hence our inspirations rise!

Teresa, Perhaps you will find that courage someday because it is amazing what can transpire as a result of our own bravery! It will come... As Pooh once said, 'We are braver than we believe!'

The Teacher's Pets said...

You are a fantastic writer and I can't wait to read your My Life As A Dog book when it is available. Thanks for following my blog and now I am following yours!

Tracy said...

Thank you Teacher's who has an adoration for pets will love my book...if you read some of my earlier blogs, it contains stories that eventually became the basis of the book. So you'll get a flavor...
Also, your blog makes me smile :)

Bossy Betty said...

Those teachers can make a huge difference!!!

Marydon said...

G'day ~ If you'd like to read about Maggie, Just Between You & Me, pop over to our write & visit ~

Lovely poetry & Happy belated birthday ...

Have a beautiful & blessed Thanksgiving holiday ~
TTFN ~ Marydon

Tracy said...

Bossy Betty, I've definitely witnessed where a teacher can make or break a child but I was fortunate to have plenty of good ones. Thanks for visiting!

Marydon, I loved reading about Maggie and the pink house...lovely.
Thank you for my b'day wishes and thoughts about my poetry...gosh it was so long ago. I'm so glad you introduced yourself and I liked visiting you as well. I'll be back to 'read' you!
Have a Blessed Thanksgiving Betty and Marydon!

lightfeather said...

Thank you so much for coming over to visit! Blogging was my lifeline for some of the most challenging times in my life and I am so happy to share my happiness with all of my blogging family now! If "Little Bird You Are Perfect" is not at your Barnes and Noble, ask them to order it. It usually takes 4-6 weeks after publishing for them to be able to do hasn't been that long yet but they do have it online. Some kind of weird thing about ISBN numbers. I would love to know how you like it! I had one of those English teachers too! It made all the difference in the world! Blessings to you!

Tracy said...

I was delighted to see your name on my blog this morning! Thank you for coming :) I can't wait to put my hands on your book and I will definitely let you know my thoughts as well as my students.
Isn't the blogging community a wonderful thing? so affirming!
I'll be seeing a lot of you!