Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Facts of Five.... and Menopause!


If you are a new follower let me give details of Facts of Five. It was a model I used when I taught students with special needs in a self contained classroom. I presented a category such as ‘Five Cartoons’ or ‘Five flavors of Kool-aid’ and the students had to consider an idea that fit the group. It was fun and thought generating yet in the meantime, I was able to get to know what was important to my students.


Okay class, so let’s begin our lesson~ our category today is ‘The Joys of Menopause’ yes, that’s right; joys! So allow me to begin…

1.) I have an opportunity to experience the four seasons in one day! Sometimes, it’s even all in one moment! I put on a sweater, get a hot flash and rip my sweater off and strip down to a t-shirt. I get the chills and put the sweater back on until the next flash strikes. Yep, put on the flip-flops, nope, it’s time for the boots! Jacket on, Jacket off, put it on then take it off…wash, rinse, repeat! You get the picture.

2.) Speaking of hot flashes…I get my daily exercise without really trying. Built in aerobic activity and weight lifting occurs when I’m pulling up my sleeves, pulling up my pant legs, pulling down my socks, taking on the sweater, taking off the sweater, pulling down the pant legs, pulling up my socks, bending to put on the slippers and kicking to take off the slippers, rush to get paper to fan myself, fan myself, open the door to feel the cold air, then close the door to leave it outside, turn up the thermostat, turn down the thermostat…who needs a treadmill?

3.) Night Sweats and sleeplessness…ahhh, now there is justification for a daily shower and changing into a clean pair of jammies frequently! Need I say more? Good reason to stock up on the cozy baggy garments. Besides, who would fault me for waking in the middle of the night to peel the soaked fabric from my wrinkled body? I’ll take advantage and surf the ‘net or catch up on my blogging, but then again, I could always feed my addiction of Face Book!

4.) Seriously, mood swings and irritability~ don’t blame me, blame the hormones for the rage and the sweetness, the irate behavior and about that coffee mug I threw at you? That really wasn’t me, just ‘Meno’ talking; she’s not very nice sometimes.  Ahhh, you look gorgeous today, but stay out of my way!

5.) Last, I have a manufactured excuse for forgetting with the sporadic strike-at-any-time memory loss. Hah, who can blame me if I put the milk in the cabinet and the dirty bowl in the refrigerator, or word recall? What was that word again? Now, what did I come into this room for? I know I was supposed to do something but what was it? I was gonna tell you something but I forgot…what was I telling you? Oh yeah, the joys of menopause!

35 comments:

Tina said...

Been there, still doing that!
Love your post! Too funny...and oh so true!
Thank you for sharing! I just posted about having a "duh" kind of day...maybe I should have blamed it on my hormones! hehe

texwisgirl said...

You're too funny! I'm SO looking forward to this part of my life - and I know it's looming... :)

Linda said...

This is indeed a fun post. I have to say, however, I missed all this fun. Hysterectomy at 45 saved me from all this misery.

Out on the prairie said...

I have a few moments myself. I wasn't sure if it was age.Hmmmm, now I can relate.Manopause.

Mildred said...

It all sounds familiar to me! I need a revolving door in my closet I change clothes so often!

Mamma has spoken said...

And what's the worse about it? You think you're done and that part of your life is over and it starts back up again! UGH, at least that's what has happen to me :o(

Penny said...

My bodies thermometer has been broken for years. I am always cold and looked forward to the day I would get hot flashes so I could be warm at least once in my life. But it never happened - no sweats - no flashes. Mood swings now that's another story. my mood can go from calm mild mannered to raving lunatic in 0to5 seconds.

Thanks for making me laugh out loud.

Hugs,
Penny

texwisgirl said...

Hi Tracy - that bird on my post today is a Great Egret. :)

Linda Reeder said...

Peri-menopause, menopause, post-menopause - it just goes on and on. At 66 I just started logging my hot flashes again to see if I could present a case for antidepressant medication treatment. The latest reports say it works.
But at least by now I'm used to it. :-)

Julie Harward said...

I hear ya sista...I have been doing all of the above for 20 years! Now at 60, I am beginning to be more cold than hot all the time...gee, what we women go through! (But maybe it is worth it to have our sweet kids and grand babies!)

Jules said...

LOL, I call those hot flashes, "Personal Summers." On the down side now of Meno but I still use it as a mood swing excuse :)
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

Ginny said...

Well, you are cracking me up!!!! I love that you have such a good sense of humor about it all, well, what else can one do? We are prisoners of our hormones, so we might as well use it to our advantage.

Kim said...

OMG....that is so funny! If I'm anything like the women in my family, I am in for BIG trouble in a few years. Seriously my aunt is lucky someone didn't kill her! She was psycho

Brian said...

That was interesting, I had no idea...well, maybe I did...and forgot!

Daisy said...

So funny, Tracy! Thanks for the laughs! :)

Nancy said...

I think I'm done with the big "M". I think. But I still can't sleep and get warm and throw off the blankets. Argh!

But I'll trade this for no more monthly visits from the period fairy. That, I appreciate.

Oklahoma Granny said...

I love your positive outlook. LOL!

Stuff could always be worse said...

You described me, I just started these Hot flashes a few months ago. I am ready for them to end!
kim

Patty Ann said...

Oh yeah, I am so right there, right now!! I think I would forget my head if it wasn't already attached. Love your attitude though. Sometimes, you just have to smile.

Corine said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Corine said...

LOL - Twice!! First with the post... and then again at the comment made by "out on the prairie."

Oh the things I have to look forward to! :D

azjuleseleven said...

Oh I'm a little bit scared. I know I should be in the throes of these woes already... at 51 for God's sake. But nope, not me, not a peep at anything pausing....
Hmmmmm. Hope I don't become one of those "Mother that gives birth at 71" and make the news in the Enquirer."

Julie Musil said...

OMG, this is hilarious! Love those seven dwarves of menopause. And the four seasons in one day is something I don't look forward to. Yikes.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Oh Tracy, I'm so sorry... Luckily, I never went through menopause. I had a hysterectomy when I was 38 ---so menopause is one thing I never experienced. I have heard many stories about it --and how hard it can be... Oh the JOYS of being a WOMAN... God Bless us ALL.
Hugs,
Betsy

Catherine said...

sigh.... I hear ya' sister... for me, it's the memory loss that is the worst. How you can be in the middle of a sentence and just completely blank out as to what the heck you are trying to say. Not really good when you are in the middle of a business meeting. Oh yeah, real professional. It's not like you can stop and say to the 'good ol' boys, stuffed shirts' in the meeting, "excuse me gentlemen, but my menopause is causing me some trouble...what was I talking about?'. :(

Oh well... what can you do...
xo Catherine

Arkansas Patti said...

Too funny Tracy:))
Don't hate me but I missed all that. Maybe it was my reward for all those times cuddling a hot water bottle in absolute misery.
Also add, #6 Being able to totally avoid that special aisle in stores devoted to women.

Jenny said...

Tracy. Oh girl, I feel your pain. I finally ended up a naturopath who tested a million things and came up with a ton of solutions. Today I feel about 90 percent better. The OBgyn and family docs I went to never offered any help.

I hope you find something that works for you, Tracy.

It just makes it hard to have a decent quality of life when you're dealing with this ick every day.

KathyA said...

I was 'thrown' into this after going a radical hys 7 years ago. And they wonder why women are so much stronger than men!!! :)

Out on the prairie said...

Did you know cultures with sweet potatoes as a main part of their diet suffer few if at all with the symptoms?

amy said...

I think I've been experiencing all these symptoms since....since, since, since.... I can't remember what I was going to say! Oh yeah--FOREVER!
Thanks for stopping by my blog. Hopefully the "big" reveal will be soon....that is if I can keep my brain on what I'm doing!!

"Professor" M. said...

When I started menopause, everyone said I was too you - I was about 39. I wasn't. At 44, the symptoms have lessoned, but I sure would like that wonderful time of the month to disappear. I think I have earned that much! Great post! Truly relevant to my life!

Carol Riggs said...

I hear ya, I hear ya. I always wear layers so I can shed one if needed. My poor hubby; I turn the heater down to 67-68 during the day and 58 at night. Mwa-haha!

eileeninmd said...

Funny post and I can say I relate to all five of these facts. Lately I can run outside to temps in the 20's and it feels so good and the memory loss just sucks. I do wish I could get at least one night of sleep without flashing.

Rose said...

Ha--sounds like you just had the night in bed that I had...or rather morning. No fun at all.

I seriously pray that meno is the cause for memory loss...

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Great post!
Sadly my life.